Building a business by yourself is hard, the aftermath

The good and the funny

A couple weeks ago I wrote about the struggles I face now that I’m trying to build a successful company around sustainable healthy living (nutrition coaching). I received a surprising amount of reactions and replies, that really warmed my heart! Also, something very important happened because of it. Not that I suddenly have found success, but something inside me changed. I want to tell you about the aftermath of this article: the good and the funny. There was no bad and ugly.

The funny

Let’s start with the funny stuff, shall we?

Y’all can’t help but inflict advice.

It was absolutely hilarious how many people wanted to help, but most people think helping = offering solutions. I mean, I get it, I probably do this as well. Now that I was at the receiving end of it, I could only laugh at how cute everyone is. I haven’t heard a lot of advice that I hadn’t already thought about myself, but I appreciate everyone’s good intentions. It was just very funny to me that almost no one asked a single question to get a deeper understanding of the problem.

If anything, I will take this as a lesson for myself. I will try and notice when I am inflicting advice onto others before I have understood the real problem. If I give advice before I have asked any question whatsoever, that should be a sign I’m inflicting help.

The problem with building a business is that it’s not only about “doing the right things”. There’s always opportunity cost (I am only working alone, I have to make tough choices where I allocate my working hours). I am also convinced there’s quite a bit of luck and serendipity involved. The people who “have made it” attribute their success to themselves and think they can create a formula that other people can copy, but really, if that were the case then almost anyone with half a brain would have a successful business.

me at work behind the laptop

The good

Writing about the struggle was cathartic. I felt so much stress around making my business a success that it clouded my thinking. Writing it down and getting it out there for everyone to read felt like a weight off my shoulders. I do care about how people perceive me, but I care more about being honest and keeping it real.

I despise the fakeness of our current social media society. On Instagram and LinkedIn you see so much bullshit. Only the highlights of peoples lives, people one upping each other with their achievements or looks. It’s one of those weird paradoxes. I think many people dislike this phenomenon, yet we all keep doing it. I’ll tell you, the only way to break this cycle is to stop doing it and start being honest about what you struggle with. People will probably respect you for it.

Anyway, what happened after publishing the article and getting reactions: I relaxed.

Now that I’ve convinced myself that I will not be a loser even if my company fails, I’m free again. Joyful feelings returned. I have less trouble working because there aren’t constantly negative thoughts going through my mind. My god, negative thoughts are such energy vampires! Now that they’re gone, I’m sleeping better, I have way more energy and I feel happier. Crazy how the simple act of writing and structuring thoughts can help.

I have reinvented the wheel yet again. I have journaled many times in my life (starting at age 7!), but I never kept up with the practice. This is yet again proof that journaling (or if you dare, writing in public) can work wonders for your mental health. No need to make it into an epic task, writing a short note at the end of the day can be enough.

Another realization

I also realized a genuine mistake I made. I thought that I would “just post on Instagram” and the followers would come. Among the followers would be potential clients. Badabing, badaboom: success!

However, social media algorithms these days are like a casino. You have to post everyday, on a schedule, engage with the platform, make trending content. Man, just writing that down makes me froth at the mouth. I have decided to make Instagram less of a focus because I’m not duking it out with an algorithm (I won’t win, almost nobody wins). I will focus more on my newsletter and creating products besides my 1:1 coaching.

I still believe my 1:1 coaching can be valuable to many people because I focus on teaching people what it’s like to live a sustainable healthy lifestyle (no fad diets, no bullshit, focus on learning habits and breaking old ones), but I want to make it more accessible. Not everyone has money for 1:1 coaching, but I can’t make it dirt cheap because I have to eat too (it’s already too cheap lol). So I’ll focus on creating books and courses alongside free articles and my newsletter.

Confusingly, the newsletter for my company is also called Live Sensibly and you can subscribe here. It focuses purely on healthy living. This personal blog is about all things in life that could fall under the umbrella of what it means to live sensibly. Damn, I’m such a marketing genius! This is not confusing at all!

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